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Posts Tagged ‘Abraham and Sarah’

I’m just going to put it out there: one of my biggest fears is that I will never marry, or that the Lord will come back before I get the chance. Call me a bad Christian, but there it is. I’d like to say that I trust God with my whole life, but because this is something I so desperately want to try and control. Therefore, it’s really hard not to get really frustrated and squirmish about my single state at times.

One of the most poignant reminders of this fact is when I look into the prospects of possibilities and find myself coming up empty.

In general, I do feel like Jesus always wants us to experience the process of things rather than just the end result, and more often than not this means that some level of pain, confusion, and hurt is involved.  In many ways these experiences show the insecurity of the people involved, and also of course the great plan that God  has to turn evil and pain into good, just out of His character. To be honest, it’s all well and good to discuss this and put a stamp of Christian approval on it, but when it comes to specific fears and hopes, I get panicked. I always feel a greater sense of calm if there’s someone I’m interested in versus when there isn’t, but since I have yet to find someone who I have had a true, deep connection with, the insecurity of wondering “why not?” can often leave me stagnant. It’s very easy to think that my past will dictate my future, when in fact the only thing that defines my future is Jesus’ choice to die for me 2,000 years ago.

The Bible is full of so many examples of God’s presence in the midst of people experiencing no prospects. Abraham and Sarah literally laughed in the angel’s face when they were told they would have a child after fifty some odd years of waiting and they were 99 years old. NINETY NINE. I would have laughed too. But yet, God still provided. Abraham later on showed how much His love and trust in God became His main focus when he was willing to lay down his son for God- which, of course, God prevented by providing a sacrifice instead. It really does warm my heart to think of that.

Anna the Prophetess became a widow after seven years of marriage, and stayed that way until she was eighty-four (!). She spent most of her time praying and worshiping the Lord, enraptured by being in His Holy presence. (First of all, can you imagine only being married for seven years and spending something like fifty years alone?!) But still, Anna loved the Lord and desperately wanted to see His glory come to Earth – and He let her see the very face of the One who was to save her. Beautiful – a wonderful example of how the Lord fulfilled her lack of prospects with the greatest one a person could ever behold.

Finally, one last example is found in Adam and Eve, and to be honest I just thought of this. I find it amazing when I think about the fact that it must have felt truly terrifying – there isn’t a word to describe the experience, really – to realize that while once they were secure and comfortable, but in one second, after one choice, they were thrown into a frenzy of fear, insecurity, and loss. Talk about feeling like there were no prospects when there once was nothing but freedom and joy! But God intervened, and gave them back access, in part, to Himself through the sacrifice of an animal to cover their naked bodies. He was showing them two things, I believe: 1) That relationship with Him is the only thing that could restore their dignity and security and 2) That He is willing to sacrifice so that we might receive a new prospect, a new hope, and ultimately a relationship with Him again.

All of these examples help me to remember just how amazing our God is, and I can think of many more from my own personal experiences. I wish that I would remember them often enough to trust Him in those moments, like I’ve experienced recently, when my dating life slightly resembles that of a mirage; something that I’m excited to see after a dry spell in the desert, only to realize that it is just a figment of my imagination. In recent days, in light of this, I have been at times so hurt and frustrated that my anger has gotten the best of me and I’ve really let God have it. Then, I justify that it’s probably all my fault and the insecurities come out – I’m too emotional, I laugh too loudly, I’m way too much of a sinner for an honorable man who loves Jesus, and my chin dimple is so not cute. And then I rest fitfully in my subtle belief that God is untrustworthy.

The fact is, He has never lied. God can only speak truth because that’s His very nature! It’s also His character to create something out of nothing; to create matter out of space; to make life triumph over death. I honestly do feel like sometimes I don’t have a holy bone in my body, but I do know that God’s prospects are given to us not because we deserve it, but because He wants to – and because Jesus’ sacrifice paved the way for hope to always win out.

It only takes one church service to attend, one party to drop by, one elderly neighbor’s grandson to meet – and it’s there. I hope that if you’re still single and feeling like you have no prospects, you can face each day knowing that there’s hope because there’s a God who is amazing at creating something out of nothing. It’s like His signature dish. And in the meantime, He is with us along the way – and that fact offers me a great deal of comfort if I ponder it.

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